It happens when I least expect it—like standing in the planner aisle of Walmart. On Molly’s never-ending list of favorite things, planners are near the top so I was balancing on tiptoes in order to find the best one.
But suddenly, staring at the shelves of cluttered planners made my stomach sink. A blanket of darkness covered and suffocated my thoughts while whispering, “You are single.”
Singleness isn’t new to me, but lonely moments like this happen every now and then. It doesn’t help I’m at an age where it feels like everyone is either in love, engaged, or in Mexico on their honeymoon.
That being said, it was weird that going to a wedding last weekend comforted me about being single. It was the first wedding I had been to in a while, and everything about it was simple, short, and small. There wasn’t a Pinterest-inspired photo booth or a clever hashtag to use on Instagram (both of which I am most likely going to have at my wedding). But the simplicity of this wedding made it clear that we all came together because of one thing: love.
It reminded me that this is what I am waiting so impatiently for.
Being single serves a lot of purposes, but I think the most important is so we can practice love. We practice so we can love the right person the right way. And news flash! Single people can love just as much as people in relationships can. Jesus himself is proof of that. He was single his whole life, yet he showed the world the greatest love it would ever know.
Trusting God is a tug-a-war. I put it singleness in his hands only to snatch it out when doubt hits me in the Walmart aisle. I let him hold things like the weather or homework, but I struggle to believe he can handle the pressure of finding me the one.
But I have to remember that God has already found him. He sees the road ahead, he sees the accident on the highway, so he knows when to take the detour. The drive will seem long and completely out of the way. I’ll probably get bored of playing car games, flipping through magazines, and watching raindrops race down the window. For the hundredth time I’ll groan, “Are we there yet?” But each day I’m avoiding people who would’ve hurt me and getting closer and closer to the person who is meant for me.
Kind of exciting isn’t it? Someone is out there for you. Or maybe you already met them and you just don’t know it yet. When the roads intersect I want to be able to say, “Hi. I took the long way for you.”
Us single people tend to feel like leftover Chinese food or a sock that can’t find its match but when you think about it, we aren’t really single. We have each other. We have family. We passions. We have dreams. We have the world to take on. We have ourselves to discover. But above all, we have a Maker who created us, a Father who will never leave, and a God who will always love us.
Sometimes those words are comforting, but other times they are frustrating because—let’s face it—God can’t cuddle, kiss, or hold hands. I know the feeling, so I just want to share this verse with you.
“Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus.” Ephesians 2:7 MSG
Wherever you are right now reading this, it’s where you are supposed to be and all in his time. Trust that he knows your heart better than you do and that he will find someone who will love it almost as good as he can. God has you exactly where he wants you. And if you are single, then that makes two.
Molly
“Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.” Philippians 4:11-14 MSG
Song//There May Be Tears by Scott Cunningham Band
Hi Molly,
This piece is simply beautiful. Rather, I should call this “piece” a work written with love, hope, and truth. It is great to hear your input on “being single” and it dawns on me to know that it is not only me feeling the same feelings you have had lately. I have been brought upon your blog from a Facebook post relating to your latest blog post, Treasures in clay: Lilli. What you have written so far in these two blogs are quite amazing and inspires me to look forward to my future and what it holds. You are now officially my number one writer, since I am very fond of your writing style and talent. Keep up the great stories and thoughts!
Best, Alex.
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This was great. Being a single christian 20 something is becoming harder & harder. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve downloaded tinder just to remove it after feeling shallow and empty. “How else do people date anymore” I ask, that’s a question I’m unable to answer since I’ve given my singleness to God. I know God has the pefect person set aside for me, as a human the hardest part is not knowing the end.
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